in-depth post 6

project type: writing a novel using first person narration. 

Big goals: write a minimum of ten chapters and however far I end up writing by march 23 should be at least 25 thousand words ( half of the minimum amount of words that a novel should be) and to have both a first draft and a second draft that includes good character development and detail for a fully immersive world. 

revisions to big goals: write a minimum of ten chapters with two drafts and fifteen chapters with one draft. by late may there should be at least 35 thousand words.

 

Progress report. 

Last blog post I had said that I was working on chapter 14 and after march 23 my plan was to switch mainly to an editorial and writing my second draft role. I have done relatively well on both fronts; I have finished chapters 14-16 and have edited chapters 1-9 as well as starting on a second draft of chapters 16. The editing has gone quite well, I am trying to remember everything I have been recently studying about grammar and plot. I have ended up adding quite a bit to my novel as I am starting my second draft, I am currently trying to work on adding traits to my characters that hint to later plot points and reveals concerning said characters.  

 

As I had also mentioned on my last blog post, I have begun work on a written list of magical laws for my story so that there can be fluency in the way that the characters interact with magic to avoid plot holes.  

 

Obstacles and frustrations. 

When I initially started writing my novel, while I did have a relatively detailed lay out of how things were going to work, it wasn’t perfect and as the characters have changed and been altered I’ve had to deviated from that original plan, meaning that my second draft has been an obstacle to write as it ended up being written with the ability to have a range of endings, now that I’ve come up with an ending that works, I have had to re-write quite a bit of the first few chapters to fit the end and it is taking more time then I would like; however I do understand that this is an important part of novel writing as the best things aren’t simply written, they are re-written, so it is an frustration that I will have to deal with.  I do now see how starting with a more determined end goal in mind could have cost me some of my current frustration.  

Evidence of progress  

This is (edited) chapter 3. I personally think that this is the most important chapter since it is when all the main characters are introduced. 

  • Black pine chapter 3  
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  •  At first, I only walked through forests, after about ten minutes I came to the end of our driveway, then I turned and started walking down the dirt road and eventually into the town. He town didn’t look much different from an old western town from movies, it had a general store, a diner and a few buildings that, while they weren’t clearly marked, looked like more stores. There was nothing familiar, I saw no brands or logos, I couldn’t have told you what time this was built, the town would have looked just as appropriate as a set on an old frontier movie as it did for me to be walking through it.  
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  •  This place is stupid, I mean, yes the massive house is cool and I’m in to the rustic feel but it’s dumb! the nearest town with more than 200 people is 75 miles away. 
  •  I looked up and saw a few things the first was an old general store made out of some stupidly beat up wood it looked like the was a gun shot or two in the porch and only one of the 3 windows wasn’t broken. 
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  •  I figured I should stop starring at the broken building because it was making me nervous, so I closed my eyes and listened, my school councilor had said that centered you or some crap like that once, so I tried it; I heard a bird, some wind in the trees and bushes and a bell, it sounded like a school bell, at least they had a school, although apparently the high school only had 30 students. I could barely hear the chatter of students leaving and they all seemed to be moving away from me. 
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  •  Like our family mansion I guess most people lived in the forest.  
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  • I stood with my eyes closed until I heard something else panting and fast foot steps I looked up and saw a girl 20 or so feet away. She had long coffee brown hair in a braid that went to her waist, vivid green eyes and pale skin first she turned I thought she was looking at me, but she called out “ David” then turned the other way and smacked me in the face with her braid. 
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  • It didn’t hurt, the people on my soccer team would hit each other in the face with our hair all the time, it woke us up for early practice, but the girl looked horrified “ohmygodi’msososossorry” it came out all as one word. 
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  •  “hi” I said 
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  •  “ don’t worry it’s not a big deal” 
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  •  “still I feel terrible” she stopped and looked surprised then she looked me up and down and paused “ are you…. new here?” 
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  •  “ oh um ya I am actually” 
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  •  she turned around and screamed “David” at the top of her lungs 
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  •   “what?” I heard a guy yell back. 
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  •  he rounded a corner from about 30 feet at first there was something about him I couldn’t quite place he looked familiar, I just couldn’t figure out why… then it hit me  He looked exactly like the girl, I knew a boy and girl couldn’t be identical twins but these two must have been as close as you could get. 
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  •  “ this is David” said the girl she pointed back at who I could only assume was her brother. 
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  •  “ well alright but who are you” I was on edge and must  of not sounded friendly because she recoiled. 
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  •  “ oh opps sorry I’m Anniya it’s nice to meet you” she said. 
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  •  she was half smiling but still seemed weary of me like she had a million questions that she was deciding if she wanted to ask me.  
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  • Even though she was about 3 inches shorter of me she was immediately intimidating, maybe it was the old football gear sticking out of her bag or just the way she was staring at me but she made me nervous. “ David this girl is new here” and gave her brother the weirdest look like she was trying to ask if she should run away from me. 
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  •  That’s when I  started noticing the differences between the two of  them, he had on paint splattered jeans ( not in an intentional way but in an I paint so much this is just what I look like now way) and a navy blue  t-shirt. 
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  •  she had on a forest green tank top, basketball shorts and her legs looked like she’d recently fallen into a blackberry bush. 
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  •  Finally after 30 seconds or so the guy spoke up “ sorry we don’t exactly welcome new people” he was not intimidating in the least. 
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  •  he was almost shrinking away from me he looked so shy and scared and his voice was shaking a little. 
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  •  “ ok why don’t you like new people” 
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  •  Anniya whispered something to David so quietly I couldn’t understand and Anniya finally responded to me “the last new person in our town killed some body” she said unbelievably bluntly. 
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  •  “what?!” i screamed, “oh my god” 
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  •  Anniya seemed more conferrable with me after my reaction to hearing about murder, she now spoke without looking like she was ready to tackle me “ any way what is your name?” 
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  •  I started to laugh, I’d forgotten about the whole introducing my self thing “ I’m Safina Dupont.” 
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  •  “ oh you’re the new people in the Dupont house” 
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  •  she suddenly relaxed and her and David walked a bit closer to me “thats so awesome our parents knew the people who used to live there I think they were probably friends with your… parents?” 
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  •  she seemed so questioning like I was royalty, as if I had a social standing just out of reach and if she said the wrong thing I would banish her, I wasn’t used to that I was used to within 30 seconds of meeting someone, seeing the inside of my own locker, she gave me power, the power I’d allowed my self to give to bullies, and I didn’t like it “ oh umm I guess my dad and my aunt maybe” 
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  •  I was trying to be nonchalant to make her feel comfortable, but it only seemed to make her more stressed, maybe she thought I didn’t like her or something? “ that’s really cool that you play foot ball I used to play soccer at my old school”  
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  • “ oh!”  
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  • she looked surprised but I couldn’t quite tell by what. “ you noticed,  I love foot ball we have a stupidly small team and can only afford to play one game a season but were really good”  
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  • “ she’s right they are” David chimed in. 
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  •  “ oh do you play too David?” 
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  •  he raised an eyebrow at me almost as if I’d asked the dumbest thing he’d ever heard the gestured at his paint splattered jeans “ I’m to busy with my art to play foot ball” his voice was still shaking a little bit . 
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  • “ oh that’s really cool” I said “I’m not nearly talented enough to draw”  
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  • “ oh it’s really not that hard” he seemed to be blushing. 
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  •  I guess he didn’t get a lot of complements “ oh he’s just being modest he’s amazing at art” Anniya seemed to be standing up for him against, well no one. 
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  •  maybe he got teased for his art? I could relate a bit to that, I just wish I had a twin who would stand up for me. Suddenly Anniya spoke up “ hey do you want us to show you around” 
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  •  “ okay that would be great”  
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  • I beamed at her she seemed so welcoming now, I did not at all feel like I was about to be tackled. 
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  •  She pointed and talked like a tour guide at first, pointing from where we stood to all the important buildings, although there didn’t seem to be very many buildings, important or otherwise 
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  •  “ ok so here is the general store” she started walking up the steps 
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  •  “ hey a weird question Anniya but why are there bullet holes in the porch?” 
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  •  she started laughing “ oh my god that’s such a weird story, but those aren’t bullet holes. The high school is really famous for their track team Davids on high jump I’m on the 1500 meter and 200 meter run, everyone has to participate it’s the only sport other teams come here to play against us, any ways, one time our javelin team one by  A LOT and they stared celebrating like crazy and started having a contest about who had the most accurate shot. no one was in the genral store so they started using the post on the veranda as a target that’s what the holes are and why all the windows are broken!” she told the story so comically and animated I started laughing, so did David. 
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  •  “ besides” she said 
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  •  “ this place has the best ice cream in the world, you need to try it” so we walked inside “hi john” she said happily to the cashier “ 3 of the usual” 
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  •  “alright” he said 
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  •  and passed her 3 cones with pale purple ice cream, and she turned to me “try it” I must have looked nervous “I promise it’s good”  
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  • And after she handed john a few coins, we all walked outside  and down the front steps, I cautiously licked at the ice cream “wow ok, you were right Anniya this is awesome!” I said. 
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  • and I wasn’t lying it tasted like blackberry with a bit of vanilla and some type of herb like maybe basil? it may sound weird, but it was awesome. After that no one said much, We all just walked and attempted awkwardly at small talk. then David spoke; it was surprising his voice wasn’t shaking and he sounded suddenly confident “ok i need to show you this if your new here”  
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  • And then  ran into a stand of trees I looked at Anniya and she looked just as confused as I did but we followed we ran for at least 10 minutes I saw houses and a few smaller stores when we were near the main road but deeper into the woods there was nothing. 
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  •  suddenly he stopped at a gate, a sign hung off it,  it read “private property” in big red letters Anniya looked over at David “hey uh David this just sort of looks like a fence and uh I don’t think we can go in” 
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  •  “your right, we can’t but she can” and he pointed at me. 
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  •   I must have looked super confused cause he pointed at some fine print “property of Dupont family” Anniya looked confused and just shrugged at me, like, do you understand what’s happening, sadly I didn’t, so we all jumped over the low fence. 
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  •  “how do you even know about this place if its private property” Anniya asked skeptically.  
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  •  David smiled “well uhh I used to help Mr. Dupont set up his computer and one day a landscape painting fell out of my bag he said it was good but I told him I needed something else to paint because well…l… I’ve painted everything in this town so he told me I could come back here, and paint this”  
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  • as he said that the trees parted and we were standing at a lake; it wasn’t your ordinary lake either, this was emerald green and yet the water was so perfectly clear could see every detail of the bottom. I could here a little waterfall and the sound of little animals, squirrels or something scuffling around, Anniya looked like she was I shock and just stood there smiling as the two of us looked down into the crystal-clear water. 
  • “ David” Anniya paused, like she was still deciding on her emotions  “ why didn’t you bring me here sooner?!?” her voice was weird, like she was laughing and getting a tiny bit mad. 
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  •  David frowned, clearly not understanding her expression better then I was “ I really wanted to” he said  “ but he only let me come back here a few times and said I couldn’t bring anyone” 
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  •  I stared off into  the lake I must have looked concerned  because Anniya sked me what was wrong “ oh” I said “ I guess I don’t Remember hearing about my grandpa being so strict” 
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  •  David looked super confused “ he was never strict we would let me go where ever I wanted in his house” 
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  •  “ then why wouldn’t he let you back here?” Anniya asked. I was squinting against the sun at this one point where there was something across the lake but for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out what the heck it was, as the two of them talked, this weird structure drew me in, I was hyper focused on the one point. 
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  •  now I’m not an impulsive person but I just took off running down the lake shore, something about the object just made me curious. I was jumping over logs and boulders I’d already cut myself in a few million places but I kept going. 
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  •  it was cold and the wind was whipping my hair around my face, I looked back only to see Anniya a few feet behind me apparently she didn’t mind running towards nothing at all either. I’d ran so fast I was nearly at the opposite side of the lake and i darted into the forest I’d only ran 100 meters or so and I stopped dead in my tracks. 
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  •  It wasn’t a mirage, it wasn’t a deformed tree, but that didn’t mean I knew what it was. 
  • We’d come to a clearing  there were no more trees the clearing was dark and cold the air was still, I looked down at the grass and there was a small pile of bricks and charred wood, that’s when I noticed the size of the clearing as I walked deeper the fog rolled in gray and thick, what looked like the burnt foot print of a building  appeared through the fog; I walked into the center. 
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  •  the ground was covered in bricks and charcoal even though we’d ran a good 5 minutes I could still hear the lake echoing through the trees.  it got colder the deeper I walked into the clearing I looked back over my shoulder Anniya was following me, walking along almost cat like swerving around bricks and gracefully jumping over  charred 2 by 4’s. 
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  •  through the thick trees I could barely see David standing on the beach trying to see us, finally I saw it, the thing I’d seen from the other side of the lake it was a building! 
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  •  It was small maybe only a story tall and one side of it was burned, but it looked mainly intact Anniya must have seen it to because she gasped “ what is that.” 
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  •  I turned around “how should I know I’ve only been here for like an hour” I paused “oh no, I told my parents I would just be out exploring the grounds for a few minutes!” I hit my palm to my forehead. 
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  •  suddenly David broke through the tree and I could see his outline in the fog “ you are technically exploring the grounds of you house” he said sarcastically. 
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  •  I mean he wasn’t wrong “ but still I should go” I paused “ David… how do I get back?” 
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  •  he sighed and reluctantly said “ follow me” at first I though he didn’t like me but then I realized, he wasn’t ready to leave the burnt building yet he had questions that needed answers “ what if we meet here tomorrow?” I suggested “ it is Saturday tomorrow” Anniya chimed in “ ok lets do it” and as Davids words rung throughout the clearing I knew we’d made a promise we weren’t going to be aloud to break. 

 

My plan for presenting my project. 

So, I plan on doing a few things for presenting my project, since it’s not really something I could take a video of (like an art project.) so I have decided to do several things to try and show how much I’ve learned. first, I will post my book summarized in a sentence, which is something I discussed with my mentor at our last meeting ‘summarizing your whole story and characters in a single sentence can be quite difficult, but it is worth it because you can easily explain the basic concepts of your story to the potential audience’ (quote Michelle, my mentor.) I will also be posting some of my favorite lines and scenes (without giving spoilers for the book.) such as jokes or statements that I am most proud of myself for writing or scenes that include lots of detail and well show case the skills I have learned for adding detail (adding detail was one of my original big goals.) I hope the people reading my learning center will be able to see a few things 1. How much I’ve enjoyed writing my novel, I hope that if someone who has always considered writing a novel, but has never started goes through my in-depth post and sees some of the techniques I’ve discussed they might consider starting a novel, it has been a really fun experience that I’ve learned a lot of skills through. 2. I want people to see some of the behind the scenes of writing a novel, when I started this, I had no idea the amount of research that goes not only into researching different writing styles but that goes into creating a believable relm. My novel does have elements of time travel and I have put a fair amount of time into researching the past to try and make the time travel element more believable (the reader should have to suspend disbelief on the fact that it’s magic, not on how people acted in the past.)  I do think that what goes into writing a novel would be an interesting thing to see and I hope others find it interesting as well.  

For the interactive part of my presentation, I plan on turning one of my chapters into a chose your own adventure, with an assortment of endings, it will probably only take people a few minutes to click through and will act as a good introduction to my characters. 

 

 

Concepts. 

concept that has become relatively apparent to me as I have started writing my novel is the amount that creative critique or even just general advice from other writers, amateur or professional can be extremely helpful. In our last meeting we re-visited the creative academy for writers, a website that includes masterclasses, motivational exercises and advice on writing from other writers (https://creativeacademyforwriters.com/ website link.). I have also been working on discussing my novel with my peers and classmates, several of which have taken an interest in my novel and have graciously agreed to do a peer review of my novel and have been giving my feedback on plot holes or ways to make certain areas more entertaining, easy to follow etc. As well as class mates that enjoy writing giving me general advice on how to write interesting stories. I was aware of how important the concept of asking others for advice was, but after me and my mentor discussed it I chose to be more proactive in asking others for help or advice as it’s the best way for me to grow my skills. 

 

Alternatives. 

Of course, when writing a novel there are lots of different pathways one can take; right from the beginning my mentor asked what style of narration I wanted to try and as well as listening to my idea, she suggested several other writing styles and shared their benefits. Throughout my book as I present my ideas my mentor has asked me questions about the 5W’s (who, what, when, why, where.) and has given my alternative suggestions based off what has worked in my mentors writing and what she thinks may work for my story 

If I had been in a different situation with my mentor some different alternatives, they may have given me might have been different character ideas, while my mentor did give me some advice on how to develop my characters, by the time we had our first meeting I already had the idea of my current characters very well laid out. Perhaps in different circumstances (if I hadn’t come up with the characters before our first meeting.) my mentor could have given my more alternative character ideas.