R – Relationships

Relationship rules are rules that basically rules to having good and healthy relationships with yourself and the people around you. When I first heard the term relationship rules, I thought that relationships didn’t need rules and that it was too restricting to have rules. However, as we learned more, I was surprised to realize that the rules were in fact not limiting at all and were actually some really good advice! One of the first things that surprised me about the relationship rules was that number one on the list was to love and accept yourself. I was kind of surprised because that last thing I expected on a relationship rules list was something about yourself! The rules stated that since the only relationship that will last forever is with yourself and that you have to be able to have a good relationship with yourself before having a healthy relationship with others. Which when I think about it makes complete sense. If I were to sum up the next few things on the list, I would say that you had to really put energy into knowing the other person and value them and your relationship. This seems really obvious at first glance, but to me, it actually gave me some really good pointers when having and maintaining relationships, something that I feel like I struggle with sometimes. A few good points that I want to remember are remembering someone’s name and focusing on the other persons interests.

The reason I chose this little piece of information to write about was because it was something that I found really helpful. I found myself referring back to these rules and making sure that whoever I’m talking to, I’m giving my full attention. Something that I found really helpful was the rule that said to focus on their interests. Though it seems a little self-conceited, (and probably is) when I would talk to someone and the conversation would dwindle down, I would panic and start telling them about myself as it was the only thing that I knew that I knew a lot about. So, by having this rule of focusing on their interests, I’m able to remember to slow down and ask them a question instead.

The relationship rules will prove very helpful during my grade 9 year, and any year in that matter. I think that a very big part in school and TALONS in general is relationships. Whether that be making them or maintaining them. So as I’m starting to meet more of the grade 9’s in my class, I think that these points will help me become more confident in my skills in meeting new people as well as making the person that I’m talking to feel comfortable For example if I were to start talking to a grade 9 in Science that I haven’t met yet, I would remember to remember their name, ask them about themselves and their interests, and to really value them as a person and my relationship with them.

 

E – Equipping

One point that really stood out to me during the Equipping lesson was the actual equipping itself. The book explained equipping as preparing someone in a way to complete a task. I never really actually considered or I guess realized that equipping someone was really important to leadership. For the longest time I had thought that by doing all the work myself, I was helping the other person. So finding out that equipping others was important and that doing all the work myself didn’t actually help them was really interesting and cool to learn about. But since that is a really broad topic, I want to focus on the Why People Fail to Equip Others section and what I want to do to not do those things. To me, the purpose of this list was to show the reader what they were doing wrong. You can’t really fix your mistakes without knowing what to fix. A few things on the list included failing to equip others because you enjoy doing the tasks yourself, wanting to keep control and underestimating the general potential and leadership potential in the people around you.

I chose this as something that I wanted to focus on this year because it reminds me of what not to do. As I mentioned before, I didn’t really know about equipping others, so when I looked at this list, I got a clearer idea of what I should be doing instead. It kind of made me realize my mistakes in a way.

I think that I can apply this list to many things in my grade 9 year. I can use it to remind myself of what not to do when working with others so that the other people in my group learn something and I don’t end up stressing myself out with unnecessary work. For example, if I’m in a group project that involves research, typing out information and making a model, I can remind myself of the rule to not underestimate others and I could give someone who doesn’t have a lot of experience with making models a chance at doing it. I could also use the rule to not be in the habit in doing all the work and use that to remind myself to let everyone else do work as well and that everyone deserves an equal chance to do and learn something.

 

A – Attitude

One of the things that I remember from the A section is from the Attitude Inventory. It was the fourth question that asked “Do you foster a healthy attitude in yourself for your family, friends, co-workers?” When I saw this, it forced me to see how my attitude can affect others and their attitudes. You could reword it as “Do you have a positive attitude inside yourself and do you try and help others around you have a positive attitude as well.”

I chose this as a focus this year because it was something that actually caused me to stop and think. When I saw this question, it made me stop and wonder if I did cause the people around me to have a good attitude as well. It also reminded me that my attitude has an affect on others as well, as sometimes I can get caught up in my emotions that I forget that it can affect other people.

I can incorporate this into my grade 9 year in many different ways. I think that by reminding myself of this rule/question every so often, I will be able to be more aware of myself and my attitude with the knowledge that it can affect other people. This way I can have a better attitude myself and help other people around me develop a healthier and more positive point of view. For example, If I’m feeling more down than usual, I wouldn’t put that on others knowing that it will affect their attitude as well.

 

L – Leadership

The Law of the Process is something that stayed in my head a while after the lessons. This law was something that said that leaders take time to develop, and that it doesn’t just take a day to become a good leader. Or to put it into the books’ words “Leaders develop daily, not in a day” Something that John Maxwell said after this also stuck with me. He mentioned something along the lines that good leaders can be made and not just born. This stuck with me because I often hear that good leaders are born, and that can discourage me sometimes because I’ll often think that I wasn’t cut out to be a leader or I wasn’t born as someone who could be a leader. So it’s reassuring to know that you can still grow to be a good leader.

I chose this because, as I said before, I often don’t think I was “born” or made to be a leader. So This quote stuck with me because it reminded me that I can grow to become one and that it takes time and effort to accomplish it.

I can use this throughout my year and throughout the rest of my life. By knowing that leaders take time to develop, I can work towards becoming a great leader and put effort into reaching this goal. I think that it will also help me become less frustrated with myself when I make a mistake in a leadership position. For example, if I were to attend another leadership conference or info session, I will be able to retain the information that I was given and put it to use throughout the years to come. This way I won’t just forget or stop doing the information that was given to me just a day after.